Maybe

I just wanna feel alive Maybe I should start smoking? Maybe I should tell her how I feel Maybe I should go and get my heart broken Maybe I should take a long walk Maybe I should put my got damn phone down Maybe I should do a lil more Maybe I should stop by my grandmas house I was thinkin' 'bout a sunny day I was wondering how to make my dad proud of the son he raised I was wondering how these kids get hooked on these one-a-days Funny thing, I be lookin' at em in a judgey way Truth is, I ain't never felt like I should run a way I ain't never had to live a life that I fuckin' hate I know people livin' with a never ending stomach ache But I been wondering if I'm really happy I ain't sad, I'm just wondering if I'm really happy I been wondering if this shit that I been chasin' Gon' be gratifying for me when it really happens I should be feelin' blessed to just be breathin' Lately I can't seem to fight the stress and all the demons Lately I just seem to treat the sex like an achievement Goin' deeper with no depth and all I left 'em with is some semen I hope that shit was worth it Look at the mistakes that made me grow into this person I been seeing all the flaws 'fore I notice when it's perfect I just wanna feel alive Maybe I should start smoking? Maybe I should tell her how I feel Maybe I should go and get my heart broken Maybe I should take a long walk Maybe I should put my got damn phone down Maybe I should do a lil more Maybe I should stop by my grandmas house I was thinkin' 'bout a sunny day I was wondering how to make my dad proud of the son he raised I was wondering how these kids get hooked on these one-a-days Funny thing, I be lookin' at em in a judgey way Truth is, I ain't never felt like I should run a way I ain't never had to live a life that I fuckin' hate I know people livin' with a never ending stomach ache All that you been bringin' me is self doubt I feel like they leechin' all my health now Ain't nobody thinkin' for themselves now All they worried 'bout is if they need you Can you help now? No All this shit gon' bring me to a meltdown Woah I done spent some weeks in the dark Only listening to beats in a seat tryna start On these words and accelerate the beat from my heart Searchin' for that high again And I want that shit to last me more than 5 or 10 minutes at a time, take control of my environment Choosin' how my time is spent, gotta let you know that Anybody with me in the middle of the night is liable to become my psychiatrist Ain't it funny how that goes Everything been good, I just wanted you to know I been growin' up I just wanna feel alive Maybe I should start smoking? Maybe I should tell her how I feel Maybe I should go and get my heart broken Maybe I should take a long walk Maybe I should put my got damn phone down Maybe I should do a lil more Maybe I should stop by my grandmas house I was thinkin' 'bout a sunny day I was wondering how to make my dad proud of the son he raised I was wondering how these kids get hooked on these one-a-days Funny thing, I be lookin' at em in a judgey way Truth is, I ain't never felt like I should run a way I ain't never had to live a life that I fuckin' hate I know people livin' with a never ending stomach ache